Operative Nyx Reporting
I woke up unable to explain what I was feeling. The Admiral was concerned about me, but I stressed I would be fine. I can't describe the feeling, other than an intense fear. My doppleganger was in the garden with Lt. Bryce Walker and displayed similar emotions. It was then I received a telepathic message from Emporer Chihuahua apologizing and saying he was taking the data I had stolen the night previously. He said he didn't tell me previously because he didn't want for me to pre-warn the Admiral, but I couldn't figure out what that meant. And it was at that moment that the Executor was hit by the Rebellion. I suddenly realized why I had so many sleepless nights prior, because I felt it. I felt the plans even though I had no conscious knowledge of it. I sent the Admiral to the bridge, while my doppleganger followed Lt. Bryce Walker to Vader's antichambers. With the data secure in the Rebellion's hands, I knew I had to complete my objective which was to kill the Sith lord himself, Darth Vader. And my doppleganger showed me the path there. Since I figured there was a 50/50 chance I wouldn't survive the attack, I decided to don my full Rebellion spy regalia and show pride in who I was. I brought my psyblade, a dual-edged bladed staff that channels my psychic power, along with my first masters' lightsaber that he handed down to me.
Right when I exited the Admiral's quarters, I was met by a team of soldiers. Channeling my ability to overwhelm the central nervous system, I attacked them with my psyblade and left them unconscious. Please note that I never kill my opponents, only stun or disarm them. I do not believe in taking a life, as it is not mine to take. The only lives I will take are those of the Sith lords, and even then, if I believe there is a chance the Sith lord isn't completely evil, I will restrain.
After battling the troops, I finally made it to the antichamber where the Admiral was. Apparently, Emporer Chihuahua gave him a heads up and told him where I was headed. In the room was my doppleganger and Lt. Bryce Walker. I do not think any of them realized who I was, except for my doppleganger. I subdued the troopers in the room, and telepathically ordered my doppleganger to fire her sidearm at me. I needed the energy to strengthen a force field I created, and with enough energy, I was able to send a psychic blast throughout the room. Luckily, Firmus was wearing the ring I gave him which was charged with my energy. As anyone who has ever fought me knows, I cannot harm anything with my own energy signature on it. Thus, I was able to protect Lt. Bryce Walker from the blast, knowing the doppleganger would survive as well. The troops fell unconscious. Before I could do anything more, Lt. Bryce Walker charged at me. I tried to say no to him, I tried to tell him to stop, but he didn't recognize who I was. I managed to teleport myself closer to the Admiral, creating a forcefield behind myself. I approached the Admiral and said my good byes, that this was somethng I had to do and he tried talking me out of it. I felt horrible about the decision, but this might be the only opportunity I have of challenging Vader. It was at that moment that Bryce used my psyblade that I had left near him on the force field.
I ordered my doppelganger to say her good byes to him, and I think he already realized that she and I were actually one. He managed to shoot through the force field which was weakened by the psyblade, and my doppleganger sacrificed herself for me. She dissipated before even hitting the ground. The Admiral tried to protect me as well, and I took that opportunity to run to the door and submit the access code. After that, all I remember is feeling as if a sledgehammer hit my back.
I awoke in the medbay accompanied by the Admiral and Eve (a robotic droid unit far superior to any other droid I have ever seen). I switched out of my Rebellion spy gear and into a uniform the Admiral had Eve bring to me. It was at that point the Admiral told me that he wouldn't have made it to the antichamber in time if not for Emporer Chihuahua telling him I sent him purposefully to the wrong place. I guess the little dog knew that it would take only a miracle to stop me from what I was about to do, and he trusted the Admiral to do it. I also found out the little turd has been harassing the Admiral via telepathy. That dog isn't supposed to be able to communicate with others, but maybe he sees the value in the Admiral as much as I do.
None the less, Eve proved very helpful and brought me my psyblade from the antichamber. Unfortunately, my lightsaber was missing. On our way back to our quarters, we were greeted by Lt. Bryce Walker who had my saber in his hand. He ordered me at gunpoint into a room where we talked. I told him who I was, and that yes, I loved the Admiral. He seemed upset, but took it like a man. The Admiral and I pleaded with him that regardless what transpired, we both considered him a good friend. He said he needed some time to think it over, and that he doesn't know if my relationship with him would change. I can accept that, for now, but I hope that someday we can become even closer friends, now that I can be completely honest with him. He said he would honor my secret, and the relationship I have with the Admiral, for now.
The Admiral and I spent the remainder of the night in our quarters, and I suggested to the Admiral that the EVE unit be housed permanently in my quarters. I have yet to hear from Emperor Chihuahua or Wicket, so I can only assume they made it to the Rebellion safely and transmitted the data. I still do not know why the Rebels attacked, and am quite sure it was not an extraction. I do not know what they were looking for or who called the strike, but luckily the casualties were minimized.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Monday, November 29, 2010
Waiting for the End
Operative Nyx' Journal
The morning started off hideously. I lost it. This ship drive me insane sometimes because I am so cooped up the entire time. I need to be connected with nature with the soil, and this ship has none of that. I am disconnected from my friends, my support networks, and myself. I hide behind a mask and I feel like it is breaking apart. I yearn to reach out and just forget my job. It is at the edge of the abyss and realizing the abyss stares back at me.
I almost set off the electrical disabling bombs in the engine and warp drive rooms. It would have been Empire ship number 46, but the Admiral talked me out of my emotions. I almost lost complete control, but I was just hurt that I felt I didn't matter to him. I returned the stolen data to him that I got from the War Room. Obviously, it's not that hard to get, so I can get it again at any time.
But today I went disk shooting with the bounty hunter, who has become quite a close friend. The funnest part came when we started blowing &$%# up. We met up later that night on Corsucant for drinks and to just chat. He's really been quite a great friend, and I had no idea Mandos were very sweet beneath their hard shells. He has also agreed to be my physical combat teacher, so I hope to sneak away from the Executor tomorrow to start this.
Lt. Walker also took me for a trip in a fighter ship and it felt so good to get out there and feel like I was doing something instead of sitting around on my bum the whole time. I miss fighting. He would be a great adversary in a dog fight, but an even better ally. I wanted to tell him who I was, but I suspect his loyalty to the Empire would put myself, the Admiral, and my dogs in danger.
The morning started off hideously. I lost it. This ship drive me insane sometimes because I am so cooped up the entire time. I need to be connected with nature with the soil, and this ship has none of that. I am disconnected from my friends, my support networks, and myself. I hide behind a mask and I feel like it is breaking apart. I yearn to reach out and just forget my job. It is at the edge of the abyss and realizing the abyss stares back at me.
I almost set off the electrical disabling bombs in the engine and warp drive rooms. It would have been Empire ship number 46, but the Admiral talked me out of my emotions. I almost lost complete control, but I was just hurt that I felt I didn't matter to him. I returned the stolen data to him that I got from the War Room. Obviously, it's not that hard to get, so I can get it again at any time.
But today I went disk shooting with the bounty hunter, who has become quite a close friend. The funnest part came when we started blowing &$%# up. We met up later that night on Corsucant for drinks and to just chat. He's really been quite a great friend, and I had no idea Mandos were very sweet beneath their hard shells. He has also agreed to be my physical combat teacher, so I hope to sneak away from the Executor tomorrow to start this.
Lt. Walker also took me for a trip in a fighter ship and it felt so good to get out there and feel like I was doing something instead of sitting around on my bum the whole time. I miss fighting. He would be a great adversary in a dog fight, but an even better ally. I wanted to tell him who I was, but I suspect his loyalty to the Empire would put myself, the Admiral, and my dogs in danger.
The Lamentation of the Heart
Operative Nyx' Journal
I think I've come to the realization that the Admiral will never be there for me the way I need a man to be there for me. Ofcourse, I will always have him in my heart but his mind is always somewhere else. I don't know how to tell him because I don't want to break his heart, that maybe it is best for us just to remain collegues. When we are together, the times are beautiful and I forget my troubles. But I feel like I am asking too much of him. I can't keep putting him in this position of choosing his job or the relationship, and although it breaks my heart to do this, I think he and I have reached our breaking point.
This is so much like what happened before. My beloved Jedi offered to leave the order to be with me, but the world needed him more than it needed us. The world needs good hearted men like the Admiral, it doesn't need an "us".
And when I think about all of those times that he said he loves me or he would leave the Empire for me, a part of me breaks inside. I am so torn. I wish this decision were easier to make.
I think I've come to the realization that the Admiral will never be there for me the way I need a man to be there for me. Ofcourse, I will always have him in my heart but his mind is always somewhere else. I don't know how to tell him because I don't want to break his heart, that maybe it is best for us just to remain collegues. When we are together, the times are beautiful and I forget my troubles. But I feel like I am asking too much of him. I can't keep putting him in this position of choosing his job or the relationship, and although it breaks my heart to do this, I think he and I have reached our breaking point.
This is so much like what happened before. My beloved Jedi offered to leave the order to be with me, but the world needed him more than it needed us. The world needs good hearted men like the Admiral, it doesn't need an "us".
And when I think about all of those times that he said he loves me or he would leave the Empire for me, a part of me breaks inside. I am so torn. I wish this decision were easier to make.
The Isolation
Operative EmpChihuahua Reporting
Operative Nyx snapped last night. I think being isolated from her Jedi friends and the Rebellion are starting to creep into her psyche, not to mention she has been talking about a strange feeling in the Force for a few days. She hardly sleeps now and spends most of her time looking at the stars. She has isolated herself from me and Wicket quite a bit lately, and I wonder if she is okay. She has never been away on a mission for months like this, and I think she bit off more than she can chew on this one. I have watched her and have noticed her strong desire to be with the Admiral is clouding her judgement.
And from what I gather, she was imploding again last night.
Let me be the first to explain I have been with Nyx ever since I was a pup. She raised me and for that I am eternally grateful. But Nyx is still young in Kiffar/human terms and sometimes lacks the ability to control her strong emotions. I know when she is imploding, and it is hard to watch her suffer so much. She struggles where she puts her duty (which is very Kiffar) before her emotions (which are very human). Her first Jedi master saw this in her and tried to temper her temper (so to speak), and managed to get her to calm down when she reached that place.
But once her eyes glaze over to red, she is losing complete control. The blue eyes I can deal with because she is still in control of herself, but the red ones are dangerous. Luckily, when I mentioned that there was no way we were getting off the Executor alive, she managed to calm down. I don't know what the Admiral said to her, but by the time Wicket and I returned to our room to sleep, I could sense she was connecting to her fears and pain. If she is in that place, she can be reasoned with.
Part of this is her learning that the Admiral has a schedule, but also for him to realize she has needs to. He seems to be constantly preoccupied and it rips her apart because he is her only connection to who she really is. Again, all of this is a part of being a spy, and although she is indeed gifted in espionage, she lacks the emotional fortitude to get her through some days. I think the stress is beginning to wear on her, and it shows. Whenever I wake up, I can sense her mind is somewhere.
Again, I do not like the Admiral because he can inadvertantly hurt her deeply. And the episode tonight showed just that. I do not know if he realizes who he is dealing with and once she puts her mind to something, she can very easily blow the entire ship up. I did not hear any alarms last night, which means that her intrusion into the War Room and various databases probably went unnoticed.
Operative Nyx snapped last night. I think being isolated from her Jedi friends and the Rebellion are starting to creep into her psyche, not to mention she has been talking about a strange feeling in the Force for a few days. She hardly sleeps now and spends most of her time looking at the stars. She has isolated herself from me and Wicket quite a bit lately, and I wonder if she is okay. She has never been away on a mission for months like this, and I think she bit off more than she can chew on this one. I have watched her and have noticed her strong desire to be with the Admiral is clouding her judgement.
And from what I gather, she was imploding again last night.
Let me be the first to explain I have been with Nyx ever since I was a pup. She raised me and for that I am eternally grateful. But Nyx is still young in Kiffar/human terms and sometimes lacks the ability to control her strong emotions. I know when she is imploding, and it is hard to watch her suffer so much. She struggles where she puts her duty (which is very Kiffar) before her emotions (which are very human). Her first Jedi master saw this in her and tried to temper her temper (so to speak), and managed to get her to calm down when she reached that place.
But once her eyes glaze over to red, she is losing complete control. The blue eyes I can deal with because she is still in control of herself, but the red ones are dangerous. Luckily, when I mentioned that there was no way we were getting off the Executor alive, she managed to calm down. I don't know what the Admiral said to her, but by the time Wicket and I returned to our room to sleep, I could sense she was connecting to her fears and pain. If she is in that place, she can be reasoned with.
Part of this is her learning that the Admiral has a schedule, but also for him to realize she has needs to. He seems to be constantly preoccupied and it rips her apart because he is her only connection to who she really is. Again, all of this is a part of being a spy, and although she is indeed gifted in espionage, she lacks the emotional fortitude to get her through some days. I think the stress is beginning to wear on her, and it shows. Whenever I wake up, I can sense her mind is somewhere.
Again, I do not like the Admiral because he can inadvertantly hurt her deeply. And the episode tonight showed just that. I do not know if he realizes who he is dealing with and once she puts her mind to something, she can very easily blow the entire ship up. I did not hear any alarms last night, which means that her intrusion into the War Room and various databases probably went unnoticed.
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Beholding Each Other
Operative Nyx Reporting
The Admiral had a full schedule, as usual, and thus I was left to my own devices. After getting bored out of my mind, I decided to honor my promise to the bounty hunter (Corden Maximus) and teach him how to relax. We met on the darkside of Tattooine where I taught him to dance. Those Mandalorians have trouble relaxing and just connecting emotionally, or rather they wear their emotions behind such a thick shell. I think I am starting to understand why I feel so similar to him, because both of our jobs keep us away from loved ones and we quite frankly, we can't have any sort of loved ones in our lives. In my world, loved ones become targets. In his, loved ones make it difficult to be gone for long periods of time. Unfortunately, at that same time, the Lt. Walker decided to ask me out for lunch (since I skipped out yesterday), and I used my ability to create a second self (e.g., which I call a doppleganger) and interacted throughout the day via my doppleganger. Corden and I continued to build on our friendship until he had to complete a mission, and I decided to return to the ship.
Upon my return, I dissolved the doppleganger and met for lunch with the Lt. Walker. He mentioned that he received some bad intelligence information, in which he was told an Empire supply ship was being attacked by the Rebellion. He said when they arrived on site, the supply ship merely had engine troubles. I am glad I planted that false information, and will continue to do so. He has agreed to show me around on his ship, and I anticipate learning some training maneuvers to relay to the Rebellion to learn how to counter for space dog fights. Interesting that both he and I have the need to get out of the ship, and that might be a great aspect to this friendship.
The Admiral didn't have a lot of time for me, but I met him in his office towards the end of the day. I did give him a ring, because I was under the impression he felt as if I was not committing to him. In a way, because of the nature of my job, there is no way I can fully commit while a war rages between the Rebellion and the Empire. But in my heart, he is the one I long for. Before giving him the ring, I blessed it so that he may always be protected and safe.
On a separate tangent, sometimes I think the purpose of life is simply to reach out and behold each other. That it is in the shelter of others that we live. This is an old saying my father used to say to me, and it was repeated by the monestary monks when I was growing up. And now, I think I am starting to understand the true meaning of it.
And in staring at the stars tonight, I could feel the heartbeats of the different life forces in the galaxy. It was so beautiful to behold. Everything is precious. Every being is from the Force. To hurt even one is to insult that which created it. I stand there each day staring at the stars, feeling the Force in the heart of each being. It radiates such love, that I feel compelled to protect life at all costs. I have sacrificed so much personally to protecting life, that I hope my sacrifice will never be in vain.
The Admiral had a full schedule, as usual, and thus I was left to my own devices. After getting bored out of my mind, I decided to honor my promise to the bounty hunter (Corden Maximus) and teach him how to relax. We met on the darkside of Tattooine where I taught him to dance. Those Mandalorians have trouble relaxing and just connecting emotionally, or rather they wear their emotions behind such a thick shell. I think I am starting to understand why I feel so similar to him, because both of our jobs keep us away from loved ones and we quite frankly, we can't have any sort of loved ones in our lives. In my world, loved ones become targets. In his, loved ones make it difficult to be gone for long periods of time. Unfortunately, at that same time, the Lt. Walker decided to ask me out for lunch (since I skipped out yesterday), and I used my ability to create a second self (e.g., which I call a doppleganger) and interacted throughout the day via my doppleganger. Corden and I continued to build on our friendship until he had to complete a mission, and I decided to return to the ship.
Upon my return, I dissolved the doppleganger and met for lunch with the Lt. Walker. He mentioned that he received some bad intelligence information, in which he was told an Empire supply ship was being attacked by the Rebellion. He said when they arrived on site, the supply ship merely had engine troubles. I am glad I planted that false information, and will continue to do so. He has agreed to show me around on his ship, and I anticipate learning some training maneuvers to relay to the Rebellion to learn how to counter for space dog fights. Interesting that both he and I have the need to get out of the ship, and that might be a great aspect to this friendship.
The Admiral didn't have a lot of time for me, but I met him in his office towards the end of the day. I did give him a ring, because I was under the impression he felt as if I was not committing to him. In a way, because of the nature of my job, there is no way I can fully commit while a war rages between the Rebellion and the Empire. But in my heart, he is the one I long for. Before giving him the ring, I blessed it so that he may always be protected and safe.
On a separate tangent, sometimes I think the purpose of life is simply to reach out and behold each other. That it is in the shelter of others that we live. This is an old saying my father used to say to me, and it was repeated by the monestary monks when I was growing up. And now, I think I am starting to understand the true meaning of it.
And in staring at the stars tonight, I could feel the heartbeats of the different life forces in the galaxy. It was so beautiful to behold. Everything is precious. Every being is from the Force. To hurt even one is to insult that which created it. I stand there each day staring at the stars, feeling the Force in the heart of each being. It radiates such love, that I feel compelled to protect life at all costs. I have sacrificed so much personally to protecting life, that I hope my sacrifice will never be in vain.
Saturday, November 27, 2010
A New Friend and Frontier
Operative Nyx Reporting
I happened to meet one of Vader's Black Squadron, Lt. Bryce Walker. He seems rather nice, and has taken an interest in me. Honestly, outside of the Admiral, he is the only one who has even noticed me. It is always best to remain a wallflower on missions, but it can often become quite lonely. It appeared he too was lonely and missing his young daughter whom was taken away by his estranged wife.
It was just strange how he and I have bonded recently. We keep bumping into each other in the halls. He invited me to lunch and I couldn't help but sneaking a peek of his posterier. I admit, I've got to really curb that habit, but obviously he takes good care of himself. I mean, he isn't a Jed Porkins! (Not that I am dissing Jed, but I mean, the Empire really does encourage their guys to stay fit!)
I made a quick detour through the file room but couldn't locate any ship plans, Death Star information, only daily bridge reports and personnel files. The files I need, I suspect, are being housed in the War Room main frame computer. I have already obtained the access code from a captain's logbook, so at least the Admiral will not be pinned if the database is accessed with his access code, and just need a diversion to get into that room. I haven't found the right diversion though. That is all I need, but I am starting to wonder if maybe, after I complete my mission, I can stay around for a while. I mean, no Rebellion spy has gotten this close to Darth Vader. But then again, maybe remaining in my position will allow me to monitor him and the fleet. This is something I have to discuss with the Rebellion HQ, but sneaking away to do so is difficult. I may have to enlist the help of my bounty hunter friend to relay the information.
And of course, the Admiral and I spent a quiet evening in our quarters while the dogs stayed in theirs. And on that note, EmpChihuahua made sure to question me throughout the day about whom I would fight for if the opportunity arose. Of course, I am a Rebel through and through, so if the opportunity arose, I would fight for the Rebels. But I would make sure that the casualties were limited on both sides. Doing this is a super-human task. And I asked the Admiral if he would fight me, and he said he wouldn't. I did make sure to tell him my track record is that I've completed every objective. I hope he understands what this means.
I happened to meet one of Vader's Black Squadron, Lt. Bryce Walker. He seems rather nice, and has taken an interest in me. Honestly, outside of the Admiral, he is the only one who has even noticed me. It is always best to remain a wallflower on missions, but it can often become quite lonely. It appeared he too was lonely and missing his young daughter whom was taken away by his estranged wife.
It was just strange how he and I have bonded recently. We keep bumping into each other in the halls. He invited me to lunch and I couldn't help but sneaking a peek of his posterier. I admit, I've got to really curb that habit, but obviously he takes good care of himself. I mean, he isn't a Jed Porkins! (Not that I am dissing Jed, but I mean, the Empire really does encourage their guys to stay fit!)
I made a quick detour through the file room but couldn't locate any ship plans, Death Star information, only daily bridge reports and personnel files. The files I need, I suspect, are being housed in the War Room main frame computer. I have already obtained the access code from a captain's logbook, so at least the Admiral will not be pinned if the database is accessed with his access code, and just need a diversion to get into that room. I haven't found the right diversion though. That is all I need, but I am starting to wonder if maybe, after I complete my mission, I can stay around for a while. I mean, no Rebellion spy has gotten this close to Darth Vader. But then again, maybe remaining in my position will allow me to monitor him and the fleet. This is something I have to discuss with the Rebellion HQ, but sneaking away to do so is difficult. I may have to enlist the help of my bounty hunter friend to relay the information.
And of course, the Admiral and I spent a quiet evening in our quarters while the dogs stayed in theirs. And on that note, EmpChihuahua made sure to question me throughout the day about whom I would fight for if the opportunity arose. Of course, I am a Rebel through and through, so if the opportunity arose, I would fight for the Rebels. But I would make sure that the casualties were limited on both sides. Doing this is a super-human task. And I asked the Admiral if he would fight me, and he said he wouldn't. I did make sure to tell him my track record is that I've completed every objective. I hope he understands what this means.
The Lost Operative
Operative EmpChihuahua Reporting
I feel that Operative Nyx is abandoning her mission. She has lost sight that the Empire are our enemies, even caring about the loss of their ranks in yesterday's deadly attack. I understand that she sees each life as precious, but without the protection of the Admiral, I fear she would have gotten herself in deep trouble already. I haven't spoken much to her or the Admiral, as I am letting their relationship run its course. I hope that she will see someday soon, that we are the Empires' enemies. I do not know what it will take to get her to open her eyes, but I hope that it will happen rather quickly.
Nyx is great at gathering information, but she appears to be hesitant to do so on this mission. I fear she worries if she completes her objective, then her mission will be complete and she must return to the Rebellion HQ. I know she has deep feelings for the Admiral and to leave him in such a manner would hurt her deeply. I completed some research on the Admiral, and it appears he makes no mention of her in his own journal. I am concerned about this because I wonder if she puts more energy into the relationship than he does. If this is the case, then it is possible he is only using her to gain access to Rebellion intelligence or to stop her.
I have received word the Rebellion intends to launch a full-scale attack on the Executor. I have not mentioned this to Nyx because I do not know which side she will fight for. Will she fight for the Rebels or will she fight for the Empire? At this point, she has to make a choice. This will be our one opportunity to destroy Darth Vader, and I cannot make this decision for her. I know she will do everything in her power to protect the Admiral, out of her deep love for him, but she risks being detected by Darth Vader if she uses any of her Force abilities. Once detected, she will have to choose between the two sides. And I fear she will choose her heart over her mind, and do anything to stay with the Admiral. She is my family so Wicket and I have decided we will stay with her until the end, but I cannot watch her change the way she has been recently. It is as if the mission has been postponed for her desire for love.
I feel that Operative Nyx is abandoning her mission. She has lost sight that the Empire are our enemies, even caring about the loss of their ranks in yesterday's deadly attack. I understand that she sees each life as precious, but without the protection of the Admiral, I fear she would have gotten herself in deep trouble already. I haven't spoken much to her or the Admiral, as I am letting their relationship run its course. I hope that she will see someday soon, that we are the Empires' enemies. I do not know what it will take to get her to open her eyes, but I hope that it will happen rather quickly.
Nyx is great at gathering information, but she appears to be hesitant to do so on this mission. I fear she worries if she completes her objective, then her mission will be complete and she must return to the Rebellion HQ. I know she has deep feelings for the Admiral and to leave him in such a manner would hurt her deeply. I completed some research on the Admiral, and it appears he makes no mention of her in his own journal. I am concerned about this because I wonder if she puts more energy into the relationship than he does. If this is the case, then it is possible he is only using her to gain access to Rebellion intelligence or to stop her.
I have received word the Rebellion intends to launch a full-scale attack on the Executor. I have not mentioned this to Nyx because I do not know which side she will fight for. Will she fight for the Rebels or will she fight for the Empire? At this point, she has to make a choice. This will be our one opportunity to destroy Darth Vader, and I cannot make this decision for her. I know she will do everything in her power to protect the Admiral, out of her deep love for him, but she risks being detected by Darth Vader if she uses any of her Force abilities. Once detected, she will have to choose between the two sides. And I fear she will choose her heart over her mind, and do anything to stay with the Admiral. She is my family so Wicket and I have decided we will stay with her until the end, but I cannot watch her change the way she has been recently. It is as if the mission has been postponed for her desire for love.
Settling In
Operative Nyx' Journal
The Admiral and I have seemed to found a place where we are comfortable with each other, and there seems to be mutual respect and trust.
I have been slipping away periodically to visit the bounty hunter who saved me yesterday, as I felt a deep connection to him and I wanted to express my heartfelt thanks. He is Mandalorian and thus, tends to hide his emotions under a rough exterior. I teased him a bit and found him to be a bit receptive to my provocations. I have offered to do something fun with him tomorrow, which I have already warned him will involve a bit of dancing while the Admiral attends to his duties on the Executor.
The Admiral returned to our quarters completely exhausted, and thus we only managed to spend a bit of time together. It was so different than yesterday where he spent quite a bit of time with me. Such is the life of an Admiral. I wish he had more time for me though, but I am willing to set those feelings aside. I admit, I have lost focus on my mission the longer I stay on the Executor. But seeing the soldiers die at the hands of the Assassin changed me somehow yesterday. I do not see them as just random expendibles, but rather beings with thoughts, feelings, and emotions. Each of those lives, regardless of which side they are fighting on, is indeed precious.
As for the Assassin, it appears my telepathic link to him has been severed. I suspect he has already met his end and I said a prayer for his departed spirit to return to the Force.
The Admiral and I have seemed to found a place where we are comfortable with each other, and there seems to be mutual respect and trust.
I have been slipping away periodically to visit the bounty hunter who saved me yesterday, as I felt a deep connection to him and I wanted to express my heartfelt thanks. He is Mandalorian and thus, tends to hide his emotions under a rough exterior. I teased him a bit and found him to be a bit receptive to my provocations. I have offered to do something fun with him tomorrow, which I have already warned him will involve a bit of dancing while the Admiral attends to his duties on the Executor.
The Admiral returned to our quarters completely exhausted, and thus we only managed to spend a bit of time together. It was so different than yesterday where he spent quite a bit of time with me. Such is the life of an Admiral. I wish he had more time for me though, but I am willing to set those feelings aside. I admit, I have lost focus on my mission the longer I stay on the Executor. But seeing the soldiers die at the hands of the Assassin changed me somehow yesterday. I do not see them as just random expendibles, but rather beings with thoughts, feelings, and emotions. Each of those lives, regardless of which side they are fighting on, is indeed precious.
As for the Assassin, it appears my telepathic link to him has been severed. I suspect he has already met his end and I said a prayer for his departed spirit to return to the Force.
Friday, November 26, 2010
A QuiEt DaY At ThE oFFiCe
Operative Nyx' Journal
The Admiral surprised me with a day off from the office, and we spent the morning together. He ended up sleeping after our morning, and I spent much of the day in meditation on the observation deck, as it tends to be very quiet throughout the day. The Admiral was extremely quiet all day, and seemed a bit agitated when he was about to go to bed.
In the interim, I had been in contact with the bounty hunter again. This time, I had a mission for him, or rather a special request. Should I ever get captured, I requested that he apprehend my dogs when they escape the Executor and take them to the Rebellion. I didn't explain why, but the male has a microchip implanted in his skin that contains all of the updated data from my mission. He asked how he was supposed to know if I had been compromised, and I explained that through a telepathic link he would know immediately. I performed the telepathic link ritual, but the first attempt failed miserably as he is a Mandalorian and they are highly guarded. I tried connecting to his inner spirit and there I found him and was able to establish the link. He questioned the extent of the connection, and I explained that I can scan his mind at any time but not vice versa, else he may meet the psychological traps that will ensnare his mind. This part is true, and I reminded him it was for his safety. Even with the connection, he preferred to use oral communication which is fine.
Since he refused to take all of the credits I was offering, I bought him several drinks at the cantina while we talked. I had too much to drink, obviously, and let my guard down. And I let out the reason why I left the Jedi Order, my mission, etc. Luckily, I have the connection to him to know if he will sell that information or simply keep it to himself (which is the most advised route). But in my haste to leave, I left my backpack including my tablet containing my journal. Luckily, it only begins with the start of this mission, but when I sober up I need to contact him to get it back. Hopefully I can do this when the Admiral is asleep again.
The Admiral surprised me with a day off from the office, and we spent the morning together. He ended up sleeping after our morning, and I spent much of the day in meditation on the observation deck, as it tends to be very quiet throughout the day. The Admiral was extremely quiet all day, and seemed a bit agitated when he was about to go to bed.
In the interim, I had been in contact with the bounty hunter again. This time, I had a mission for him, or rather a special request. Should I ever get captured, I requested that he apprehend my dogs when they escape the Executor and take them to the Rebellion. I didn't explain why, but the male has a microchip implanted in his skin that contains all of the updated data from my mission. He asked how he was supposed to know if I had been compromised, and I explained that through a telepathic link he would know immediately. I performed the telepathic link ritual, but the first attempt failed miserably as he is a Mandalorian and they are highly guarded. I tried connecting to his inner spirit and there I found him and was able to establish the link. He questioned the extent of the connection, and I explained that I can scan his mind at any time but not vice versa, else he may meet the psychological traps that will ensnare his mind. This part is true, and I reminded him it was for his safety. Even with the connection, he preferred to use oral communication which is fine.
Since he refused to take all of the credits I was offering, I bought him several drinks at the cantina while we talked. I had too much to drink, obviously, and let my guard down. And I let out the reason why I left the Jedi Order, my mission, etc. Luckily, I have the connection to him to know if he will sell that information or simply keep it to himself (which is the most advised route). But in my haste to leave, I left my backpack including my tablet containing my journal. Luckily, it only begins with the start of this mission, but when I sober up I need to contact him to get it back. Hopefully I can do this when the Admiral is asleep again.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Abducted
Operative Nyx' Journal
The assassin returned with a vengence. He crashed into the Executor and was captured. I went into the jail to confront him, not knowing he was strong enough to break out of the shackles. He grabbed the lightsaber I inadvertantly brought in with me, and started to decimate the troops. He tried outing me saying I was a spy and a Jedi, so I finally told him that if he wanted to kill me, then he needed to face me. Unfortunately, to him that meant taking me aboard his ship. I was trapped there for what seemed like a millenium trying to escape until I finally gave up. All he told me was his name was Revan. He even offered me the opportunity to kill him, but I couldn't. I am not a murderer, I am a healer and the premise of my faith is to "do no harm." It was during the trip that he had a change in consciousness and said he was really a Jedi in training, named Riku. That was the name I remember calling out before passing out after a major headache the day prior. It was all very confusing, and in the end, he did kill three assassins when we landed on what I prefer to deem, Sith Central. It was at this point I fell asleep on the incapacitated ship and Emporer Chihuahua activated my homing beacon stored in my pendant.
It was this signal that alerted a bounty hunter named @Corden_Maximus who kind of was off-putting initially. But during our trip, he apeared to be quite the gentleman, even sensing when I was down or outright lying. I could tell he caught on to what I really felt, but I was so overcome with emotion I couldn't hold it back anymore. I was angry at myself for falling victim to the game of a Sith (just like the last time). We exchanged pleasantries, and I even teased him a bit. There was a profound connection to him that I can't exactly explain. It was as if my job as a Rebellion spy and his as a bounty hunter were so similar, that maybe there was an unspoken understanding between us. Everything felt comfortable and so relaxed. I didn't have to be something I wasn't, I could just enjoy myself, and all of my masks dropped. He finally returned me to the Admiral, and I think the Admiral seemed offended by the attention I was giving to Corden. After a bit too much to drink, I admit it is difficult to contain my emotions. And for saving my life, I gave him the second Star stone from my homeland. I have the other, and they are essentially two pieces of the same stone. It is very sacred to give these away as they are so rare, and in doing so, it is a sign that I recognize him as a piece of the same soul I have. It is a gesture of deep respect and friendship. If he decides to sell it, then the stone will return to me somehow. But if he keeps it, then that reaffirms the friendship and the bond will be forever.
But I had to witness the carnage myself, the death of those soldiers that died because of me. While the Admiral and Corden were speaking, I ran into the brig and saw the blood splattered all over the hallways. I touched the blood and relived the killing of each soldier through his eyes. It was horrifying and I cried out in pain and anguish. I almost lost it. I almost lost control of myself completely, but luckily Emporer Chihuahua was there and calmed me down. Unfortunately, I still screamed and the Admiral arrived. I was a bit cold towards him. I couldn't tell him I was disappointed it wasn't him that rescued me, I couldn't ask him why he didn't come after me. I just put that all aside and lived life as normal.
Unfortunately, my back is completely covered with bruising from the fight. I couldn't even take a bath I was so sore. I type this while lying in the arms of my Admiral.
The assassin returned with a vengence. He crashed into the Executor and was captured. I went into the jail to confront him, not knowing he was strong enough to break out of the shackles. He grabbed the lightsaber I inadvertantly brought in with me, and started to decimate the troops. He tried outing me saying I was a spy and a Jedi, so I finally told him that if he wanted to kill me, then he needed to face me. Unfortunately, to him that meant taking me aboard his ship. I was trapped there for what seemed like a millenium trying to escape until I finally gave up. All he told me was his name was Revan. He even offered me the opportunity to kill him, but I couldn't. I am not a murderer, I am a healer and the premise of my faith is to "do no harm." It was during the trip that he had a change in consciousness and said he was really a Jedi in training, named Riku. That was the name I remember calling out before passing out after a major headache the day prior. It was all very confusing, and in the end, he did kill three assassins when we landed on what I prefer to deem, Sith Central. It was at this point I fell asleep on the incapacitated ship and Emporer Chihuahua activated my homing beacon stored in my pendant.
It was this signal that alerted a bounty hunter named @Corden_Maximus who kind of was off-putting initially. But during our trip, he apeared to be quite the gentleman, even sensing when I was down or outright lying. I could tell he caught on to what I really felt, but I was so overcome with emotion I couldn't hold it back anymore. I was angry at myself for falling victim to the game of a Sith (just like the last time). We exchanged pleasantries, and I even teased him a bit. There was a profound connection to him that I can't exactly explain. It was as if my job as a Rebellion spy and his as a bounty hunter were so similar, that maybe there was an unspoken understanding between us. Everything felt comfortable and so relaxed. I didn't have to be something I wasn't, I could just enjoy myself, and all of my masks dropped. He finally returned me to the Admiral, and I think the Admiral seemed offended by the attention I was giving to Corden. After a bit too much to drink, I admit it is difficult to contain my emotions. And for saving my life, I gave him the second Star stone from my homeland. I have the other, and they are essentially two pieces of the same stone. It is very sacred to give these away as they are so rare, and in doing so, it is a sign that I recognize him as a piece of the same soul I have. It is a gesture of deep respect and friendship. If he decides to sell it, then the stone will return to me somehow. But if he keeps it, then that reaffirms the friendship and the bond will be forever.
But I had to witness the carnage myself, the death of those soldiers that died because of me. While the Admiral and Corden were speaking, I ran into the brig and saw the blood splattered all over the hallways. I touched the blood and relived the killing of each soldier through his eyes. It was horrifying and I cried out in pain and anguish. I almost lost it. I almost lost control of myself completely, but luckily Emporer Chihuahua was there and calmed me down. Unfortunately, I still screamed and the Admiral arrived. I was a bit cold towards him. I couldn't tell him I was disappointed it wasn't him that rescued me, I couldn't ask him why he didn't come after me. I just put that all aside and lived life as normal.
Unfortunately, my back is completely covered with bruising from the fight. I couldn't even take a bath I was so sore. I type this while lying in the arms of my Admiral.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
The Assassin - Update
Operative Nyx Journal
The Sith Assassin and I appear to have a strong psychic connection, to where his medical symptoms appeared also in my body. His headache manifested in my own. I felt a surge of Force enter my body, to the point I had passed out. But in the state between consciousness and unconsciousness, I heard a voice say a name in my mind. It was, "Riku" and then the world turned dark as I said the name.
Who is Riku? Is that this Assassin's name? His heart is cold and it is almost like it is a shell of a being. But there is something missing from his being, and I can't quite put my finger on it.
In unrelated news, Firmus and I spent much of the day together talking and then had a wonderful moment to dance in the observatory under the stars. The night ended like that of most worknights, cutting straight to sleep!
The Sith Assassin and I appear to have a strong psychic connection, to where his medical symptoms appeared also in my body. His headache manifested in my own. I felt a surge of Force enter my body, to the point I had passed out. But in the state between consciousness and unconsciousness, I heard a voice say a name in my mind. It was, "Riku" and then the world turned dark as I said the name.
Who is Riku? Is that this Assassin's name? His heart is cold and it is almost like it is a shell of a being. But there is something missing from his being, and I can't quite put my finger on it.
In unrelated news, Firmus and I spent much of the day together talking and then had a wonderful moment to dance in the observatory under the stars. The night ended like that of most worknights, cutting straight to sleep!
Monday, November 22, 2010
Jedi into a Sith
Operative Nyx' Journal
I felt all of the feelings well within me. Frustration, anger, fear, and finally hatred as I watched the young girl be murdered at the hands of the Sith assassin. He seemed to revel in the fact that I had to bear witness to it, and I had to experience it for myself. I awoke to find a bruise above my heart, the same place that the young girl was pierced. I felt her spirit lift from her body and I was angry. I was angry at the assassin, angry at myself for being so weak, and angry that no one could stop it. I felt so... powerless.
Operative Emporer Chihuahua's Journal
Operative Nyx has been sheltered most of her life. The pain she experienced was that of loss of her father, mother, her first master, and the loss of her first love. Even with these "losses", she is able to maintain a psychic connection to those spirits and thus the loss is not really a loss since she can still feel them. She has never witnessed a senseless and violent death. She tends to see the world through rose-colored glasses and thinks she will be safe on the basis of her outlook on life. She said a part of her was lost in witnessing the death of that young girl, and yet I wonder if Nyx' observation wasn't accurate of how we all feel in those circumstances. I worry if her desire for revenge won't overtake her to the point she seeks out and destroys the assassin.
And yes, I did open a communication channel briefly to Piett to give him perspective. I did this not for him, but because of my love for her. I realize I cannot provide everything she needs in her life, but I can try to help her get the help she needs. He's a bit clueless, so I risked revealing my thoughts for her sake. It is easier to maintain cover if I appear her faithful puppy versus her partner in the mission. He seemed sincere in his regard for her welfare, thinking he could protect her, but as I explained, he cannot protect her from the dark side. I seem to believe he thinks his caring and love will save her from turning, and I don't quite know if that is enough. My last thought to him was that she needed to be recalled from the mission and go home. I do not know if he fully understood what that meant, but I hope he takes that into consideration.
I will continue to maintain my vigilance over Operative Nyx. If I believe she is in extreme danger to herself or others, I will recall the mission myself. And with that, if she cannot control her strong emotions, we all know that is how the dark side begins to take hold. For her safety, she will need to be recalled if it gets that far.
I felt all of the feelings well within me. Frustration, anger, fear, and finally hatred as I watched the young girl be murdered at the hands of the Sith assassin. He seemed to revel in the fact that I had to bear witness to it, and I had to experience it for myself. I awoke to find a bruise above my heart, the same place that the young girl was pierced. I felt her spirit lift from her body and I was angry. I was angry at the assassin, angry at myself for being so weak, and angry that no one could stop it. I felt so... powerless.
Operative Emporer Chihuahua's Journal
Operative Nyx has been sheltered most of her life. The pain she experienced was that of loss of her father, mother, her first master, and the loss of her first love. Even with these "losses", she is able to maintain a psychic connection to those spirits and thus the loss is not really a loss since she can still feel them. She has never witnessed a senseless and violent death. She tends to see the world through rose-colored glasses and thinks she will be safe on the basis of her outlook on life. She said a part of her was lost in witnessing the death of that young girl, and yet I wonder if Nyx' observation wasn't accurate of how we all feel in those circumstances. I worry if her desire for revenge won't overtake her to the point she seeks out and destroys the assassin.
And yes, I did open a communication channel briefly to Piett to give him perspective. I did this not for him, but because of my love for her. I realize I cannot provide everything she needs in her life, but I can try to help her get the help she needs. He's a bit clueless, so I risked revealing my thoughts for her sake. It is easier to maintain cover if I appear her faithful puppy versus her partner in the mission. He seemed sincere in his regard for her welfare, thinking he could protect her, but as I explained, he cannot protect her from the dark side. I seem to believe he thinks his caring and love will save her from turning, and I don't quite know if that is enough. My last thought to him was that she needed to be recalled from the mission and go home. I do not know if he fully understood what that meant, but I hope he takes that into consideration.
I will continue to maintain my vigilance over Operative Nyx. If I believe she is in extreme danger to herself or others, I will recall the mission myself. And with that, if she cannot control her strong emotions, we all know that is how the dark side begins to take hold. For her safety, she will need to be recalled if it gets that far.
Telepathic Link Proves Deadly
I saw the most horrible sight that plagues my mind. The same Sith assassin I encountered days ago used my telepathic link against me. He showed me him killing his last target, and so I would actually feel her dying. I thought I was actually there, to the extent I felt the pain myself. He is evil incarnate and asked me to challenge him, but I refused. Stationed on Piett's ship means that I will not be able to leave without blowing my cover. I have decided instead to see if I can talk some sense into him. As I told him, "I will become a splinter in your mind."
I collapsed in my office. I called out to the Admiral, but he never responded. I am afraid that I am truly alone.
I collapsed in my office. I called out to the Admiral, but he never responded. I am afraid that I am truly alone.
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Testing the Admiral
Operative Emporer Chihuahua Reporting
Let it be known I shall never call Admiral Piett by his first name, and he shall be known as "Piett" or the "Admiral" in all future reporting. I would prefer to write, "num nutts" but this is a professional report so I will maintain it as such. I rewired the droid assigned to walk my wife, Wicket, and me around for our daily walks. It is now my slave and will operate as I command. This particular droid is maintained on a semi-monthly basis so the reprogramming should not be discovered, as I will switch back to the original programming prior to its scheduled repairs.
As stated earlier, Piett has been giving me the cold shoulder. Operative Nyx went to sleep prior to me being able to debrief with her, but I was able to scan her thought patterns and keep an open telepathic link while she was talking with Piett. It appears Piett is disturbed I do not like him, and Nyx explained that I never would. This part is the truth. He smells of deception and as long as Nyx is eating out of his hand, then he will never be trustworthy. Even if he does not hurt her or even myself or my wife, Nyx can easily be compromised to giving out the locations of each Rebel base. I do not know if she recognizes this problem or not, but I believe as soon as the Admiral gets what it is he is after, he will abandon her. I know that will crush her inside, and that is ultimately why I do not trust him. Nyx is my family, and I will protect her to the best extent of my ability, even if I end up looking like the bad guy (how ironic).
Wicket and I searched Piett's quarters and found some contraband in which I stowed away in our droid. This shall be used for, further evidence, perhaps. Other than that, Nyx is confident that the information we need is located in the main frame computer in the War Room or in Piett's office. We will be coming up soon on the abandoned rebel base, and I know Nyx is handling that fine.
And I did re-route Operative Nyx' journal and field report submissions so that Piett could not locate them. It appears this was a successful move and I will continue to do so, to protect her at all costs.
Let it be known I shall never call Admiral Piett by his first name, and he shall be known as "Piett" or the "Admiral" in all future reporting. I would prefer to write, "num nutts" but this is a professional report so I will maintain it as such. I rewired the droid assigned to walk my wife, Wicket, and me around for our daily walks. It is now my slave and will operate as I command. This particular droid is maintained on a semi-monthly basis so the reprogramming should not be discovered, as I will switch back to the original programming prior to its scheduled repairs.
As stated earlier, Piett has been giving me the cold shoulder. Operative Nyx went to sleep prior to me being able to debrief with her, but I was able to scan her thought patterns and keep an open telepathic link while she was talking with Piett. It appears Piett is disturbed I do not like him, and Nyx explained that I never would. This part is the truth. He smells of deception and as long as Nyx is eating out of his hand, then he will never be trustworthy. Even if he does not hurt her or even myself or my wife, Nyx can easily be compromised to giving out the locations of each Rebel base. I do not know if she recognizes this problem or not, but I believe as soon as the Admiral gets what it is he is after, he will abandon her. I know that will crush her inside, and that is ultimately why I do not trust him. Nyx is my family, and I will protect her to the best extent of my ability, even if I end up looking like the bad guy (how ironic).
Wicket and I searched Piett's quarters and found some contraband in which I stowed away in our droid. This shall be used for, further evidence, perhaps. Other than that, Nyx is confident that the information we need is located in the main frame computer in the War Room or in Piett's office. We will be coming up soon on the abandoned rebel base, and I know Nyx is handling that fine.
And I did re-route Operative Nyx' journal and field report submissions so that Piett could not locate them. It appears this was a successful move and I will continue to do so, to protect her at all costs.
The Compromised Operative
Operative Emporer Chihuahua Reporting
It has come to my attention that Operative Nyx is not functioning clearly and her mind is clouded by her human emotions. I am assuming a second set of reporting duties at this point as she has been compromised and her reporting is no longer valid, in my opinion. I am with Operative Nyx for a majority of the day, therefore I know her whereabouts. Luckily, I have been allowed to accompany her throughout her routine as secretary to the Admiral. But she is not herself. She is in a mental space that is clouding her objectivity. I will continue to watch over her. If I notice her continuing this downward spiral, I will make the arrangement to get her reassigned.
I fear this assignment was too much for her.
I confronted the Admiral and in the discussion, he shut off the comm line to me. There is something afoot and I am getting closer to aborting this mission on the authority that although it is Nyx' assignment, I am still the ranking officer. I do not want to hurt her feelings in reminding her, but she needs to obey my commands.
It has come to my attention that Operative Nyx is not functioning clearly and her mind is clouded by her human emotions. I am assuming a second set of reporting duties at this point as she has been compromised and her reporting is no longer valid, in my opinion. I am with Operative Nyx for a majority of the day, therefore I know her whereabouts. Luckily, I have been allowed to accompany her throughout her routine as secretary to the Admiral. But she is not herself. She is in a mental space that is clouding her objectivity. I will continue to watch over her. If I notice her continuing this downward spiral, I will make the arrangement to get her reassigned.
I fear this assignment was too much for her.
I confronted the Admiral and in the discussion, he shut off the comm line to me. There is something afoot and I am getting closer to aborting this mission on the authority that although it is Nyx' assignment, I am still the ranking officer. I do not want to hurt her feelings in reminding her, but she needs to obey my commands.
A TRIBUTE TO A LEGEND: JoSePH CamPBeLL
(I am re-posting this from my real life blog, because it pertains to the Star Wars universe. Please note that this was not written as my character, but from myself - the author. In love and light!)
* * * *
For those who unaware of who Joseph Campbell is, you might be surprised to learn that it was his work on the archetype of the "Hero" which helped mold the character that is/was Luke Skywalker from the Star Wars Universe. Joseph Campbell was one of the best world mythologists, and even to this day, is still one of the best.
One of my biggest regrets was not being born about 20 years earlier to have studied under Joe. I was priviledged enough to have had a professor in graduate school that was one of Joe's students, and she said he could talk from sun-up-to-sun-down on everything mythology related. Joe is the man that aquainted the Westernized world with the phrase, "Follow your Bliss." Meaning that which brings you ultimate fulfillment in life, that is where you should follow.
I have Joe's "Power of Myth" in both book and DVD format where he discusses at length the mythology and traditions of the world. I can listen to those DVDs non-stop because I adore his work so much. At the time of his death, he was working on a compendium of world mythological resources that unfortunately, have never been completed. I think mythology and storytelling are vital to the spirit of humanity, and for this, I thank Mr. Campbell for awakening my love of myth.
In tribute and memoriam, this post is for you Joe. Namaste!
* * * *
For those who unaware of who Joseph Campbell is, you might be surprised to learn that it was his work on the archetype of the "Hero" which helped mold the character that is/was Luke Skywalker from the Star Wars Universe. Joseph Campbell was one of the best world mythologists, and even to this day, is still one of the best.
One of my biggest regrets was not being born about 20 years earlier to have studied under Joe. I was priviledged enough to have had a professor in graduate school that was one of Joe's students, and she said he could talk from sun-up-to-sun-down on everything mythology related. Joe is the man that aquainted the Westernized world with the phrase, "Follow your Bliss." Meaning that which brings you ultimate fulfillment in life, that is where you should follow.
I have Joe's "Power of Myth" in both book and DVD format where he discusses at length the mythology and traditions of the world. I can listen to those DVDs non-stop because I adore his work so much. At the time of his death, he was working on a compendium of world mythological resources that unfortunately, have never been completed. I think mythology and storytelling are vital to the spirit of humanity, and for this, I thank Mr. Campbell for awakening my love of myth.
In tribute and memoriam, this post is for you Joe. Namaste!
A Prisoner of the Sith
Emporer Chihuahua and Wicket are skilled at hiding because as a team, we've had plenty of opportunity to practice. I haven't been so fortunate in the past to evade capture. You can say, it is a workplace hazard for the nature of the work I do. All connections to the Rebellion are severed at that point, and it is just me and my capter. There were a few incidents of being detained, but there was one in particular of actual capture.
It was a mission gone wrong. Emporer Chihuahua advised me to not take this mission, but with so few Rebellion spies, I had to retrieve the data. There was a relatively secluded Empire outpost near where I was stationed, and we received information that their computer was connected to the Empire mainframe where a new fighter plane's blueprints were being housed. It didn't make sense why the Empire would take their newest technology and leave the blueprints on an unguarded computer, but we trusted our source. Emporer Chihuahua and Wicket insisted on accompanying me.
We entered the compound successfully, dispatching some security when appropriate. As common protocol, Emporer Chihuahua and Wicket found a small ground-level air shaft to hide in, their tracking beacons active for retrieval should I not return. I located the main frame computer and attempted to hack it. While my attention was diverted on breaking into the main frame computer, a Sith lord in training appeared. I suspected he was in the room the entire time, but I was so adamant about obtaining the information I couldn't sense him.
All I remember is waking up chained to a wall in a dark dank cave. It appeared I was not the Empire's prisoner, but rather his. Those days and nights were filled with agonizing torment as he tried to break my mind. Eventually, he became frustrated with not receiving whatever it is he wanted, and resorted to a bit of 'Sith Shock Therapy.' All I remember is feeling a great energy surge through my body, his face contorted in shock, and losing consciousness.
I awoke in a medical transport vessel with Emporer Chihuahua and Wicket beside me. According to them, I had gone missing for several days after the botched mission, and they activated the homing beacon inside my pendant (which meant risking the detection of the Empire as well). I was supposed to be left alone to die at my capter's hands, but they are my most faithful companions, and broke protocol to bring me back home. They said when they found me in the remote cave, I was completely alone. I have never been contacted by that Sith lord, and I do not know if he still exists.
It was a mission gone wrong. Emporer Chihuahua advised me to not take this mission, but with so few Rebellion spies, I had to retrieve the data. There was a relatively secluded Empire outpost near where I was stationed, and we received information that their computer was connected to the Empire mainframe where a new fighter plane's blueprints were being housed. It didn't make sense why the Empire would take their newest technology and leave the blueprints on an unguarded computer, but we trusted our source. Emporer Chihuahua and Wicket insisted on accompanying me.
We entered the compound successfully, dispatching some security when appropriate. As common protocol, Emporer Chihuahua and Wicket found a small ground-level air shaft to hide in, their tracking beacons active for retrieval should I not return. I located the main frame computer and attempted to hack it. While my attention was diverted on breaking into the main frame computer, a Sith lord in training appeared. I suspected he was in the room the entire time, but I was so adamant about obtaining the information I couldn't sense him.
All I remember is waking up chained to a wall in a dark dank cave. It appeared I was not the Empire's prisoner, but rather his. Those days and nights were filled with agonizing torment as he tried to break my mind. Eventually, he became frustrated with not receiving whatever it is he wanted, and resorted to a bit of 'Sith Shock Therapy.' All I remember is feeling a great energy surge through my body, his face contorted in shock, and losing consciousness.
I awoke in a medical transport vessel with Emporer Chihuahua and Wicket beside me. According to them, I had gone missing for several days after the botched mission, and they activated the homing beacon inside my pendant (which meant risking the detection of the Empire as well). I was supposed to be left alone to die at my capter's hands, but they are my most faithful companions, and broke protocol to bring me back home. They said when they found me in the remote cave, I was completely alone. I have never been contacted by that Sith lord, and I do not know if he still exists.
REBELLION FILE UPDATE: Admiral Firmus Piett
Operative Nyx' Recommended Changes
The Admiral has vocalized his support to the Rebellion. He desires the war to end and to bring peace to the galaxy. His loyalty to the Sith, specifically Darth Vader, has been validated but he also sees the need for the war to end. He values himself as a soldier and will perform as much, but I believe my contact with him has softened his perception of the war the Sith are raging across the galaxy. It is possible that he felt alone in these beliefs and kept them to himself all these years, building a reputation for heartlessness and cruelty, but only because he lacked a support on the outside. I will continue my observations of the Admiral.
Operative Chihuahua's Rebuttal
Call it a gut instinct, but I do not trust the Admiral. He knows Operative Nyx has been compromised and will say whatever is necessary to keep her on his ship. Although he has said he desires to help the Rebellion, he has yet to provide any intelligence. And even if it were to be provided, it would take time to validate that information. I recommend that Operative Nyx' report be filed but my report takes precedence. I have not been compromised and will continue to stay alert. The Admiral has two sides to his personality, and neither do I trust.
The Admiral has vocalized his support to the Rebellion. He desires the war to end and to bring peace to the galaxy. His loyalty to the Sith, specifically Darth Vader, has been validated but he also sees the need for the war to end. He values himself as a soldier and will perform as much, but I believe my contact with him has softened his perception of the war the Sith are raging across the galaxy. It is possible that he felt alone in these beliefs and kept them to himself all these years, building a reputation for heartlessness and cruelty, but only because he lacked a support on the outside. I will continue my observations of the Admiral.
Operative Chihuahua's Rebuttal
Call it a gut instinct, but I do not trust the Admiral. He knows Operative Nyx has been compromised and will say whatever is necessary to keep her on his ship. Although he has said he desires to help the Rebellion, he has yet to provide any intelligence. And even if it were to be provided, it would take time to validate that information. I recommend that Operative Nyx' report be filed but my report takes precedence. I have not been compromised and will continue to stay alert. The Admiral has two sides to his personality, and neither do I trust.
Old and New Friends
I challenged Snowcoog to honor his statement made approximately four days ago (e.g., if I was indeed a worthy follower of Darth Jesus). Today, he called me to his chamber for a discussion. Being that SnowCoog is #2 in the organization and I am #4 (under EvilFreakazoid) and to maintain my honor, I had to show up. Unfortunately, being stationed on Admiral Piett's ship makes it difficult to leave on such short notice, so I sent a hologram of myself to attend.
During the meeting, SnowCoog asked various questions regarding my "Sith" mentality. I was clear on my stance that I believe that, "I hold life more important than power, and democracy more important than domination." Clearly this statement is made by one trained as a Jedi knight, not a Sith who believes otherwise.
Afterward, SnowCoog made the following proposition, "I believe that you truly understand more than even you realize. Yet this lingering for love, and friendship keeps you from reaching true glory. We two or totally different, yet very similar. I now see that during my exile. And I thought that learning the best way to be evil, to embrace hate was the answer, but I now see it is you. So here is my proposal...no more following @Darth_Jesus_, no more fighting between each other. Just me and you, partners. You teach me what it means to be light, to love, to endure, and I show you the power that I understand."
I rejected the proposition, stating that I would only leave the organization if Darth Jesus requested me to. With that SnowCoog celebrated that he would hand over his status in the organization to me, so he could pursue other endeavors, as I was worthy of Darth Jesus' #2 status.
In retrospect, I already miss the banter and fighting between us. But SnowCoog is leaving for other adventures, but promises to someday return. Because of this, I do not see myself as #2 in the organization, but merely keeping the seat warm for when SnowCoog is ready to resume his duties. Darth Jesus is supposed to approve of the transfer upon his return tomorrow.
During the meeting, SnowCoog asked various questions regarding my "Sith" mentality. I was clear on my stance that I believe that, "I hold life more important than power, and democracy more important than domination." Clearly this statement is made by one trained as a Jedi knight, not a Sith who believes otherwise.
Afterward, SnowCoog made the following proposition, "I believe that you truly understand more than even you realize. Yet this lingering for love, and friendship keeps you from reaching true glory. We two or totally different, yet very similar. I now see that during my exile. And I thought that learning the best way to be evil, to embrace hate was the answer, but I now see it is you. So here is my proposal...no more following @Darth_Jesus_, no more fighting between each other. Just me and you, partners. You teach me what it means to be light, to love, to endure, and I show you the power that I understand."
I rejected the proposition, stating that I would only leave the organization if Darth Jesus requested me to. With that SnowCoog celebrated that he would hand over his status in the organization to me, so he could pursue other endeavors, as I was worthy of Darth Jesus' #2 status.
In retrospect, I already miss the banter and fighting between us. But SnowCoog is leaving for other adventures, but promises to someday return. Because of this, I do not see myself as #2 in the organization, but merely keeping the seat warm for when SnowCoog is ready to resume his duties. Darth Jesus is supposed to approve of the transfer upon his return tomorrow.
Saturday, November 20, 2010
The Deep Divide
Firmus and I reached a breaking point. I was unaware he was previously committed to another, and I would have hoped he would have told me somewhere before I tangled my heart into his. I felt betrayed and as if he were being dishonest by hiding something that significant. If he had been honest and upfront, I could have quickly forgotten the issue and moved on. The issue quickly escalated to where I asked Emporer Chihuahua and Wicket to find their hiding place and await a transport ship for delivery to the Rebellion. Fearing that this was the end, I prepared both my heart and my mind for my final stand. I would never allow myself to be captured again, especially by the Sith for they are truly the most tortured souls.
I awaited for him in his quarters.
It was there we confronted each other. He apparently found this journal and said he knew I had been spying. I said I was aware he was previously committed to another and felt betrayed. A man cannot propose to one woman after being committed to another, that is a great sin among my people. It was at that point he said that there was some sort of dissolution of the relationship, which placed my mind at ease. But I believe the heart of our issues was resolved in that he is loyal to his job, as I was loyal to my own, but the miracle was that we are loyal to each other. He confided at that point that he was tired of this war between the Rebels and the Empire and desired peace as much as I did.
And that is when everything changed. The illusion was that where I thought there was a divide, there wasn't one. He was helping me because he believed in what it is I am doing. I am bringing an end to this war. I know I cannot do it alone, but his support has placed my mind at great ease.
The Rebel base is coming up soon. To give the illusion of the Admiral doing a supurb job, I am giving him the coordinates tomorrow so that he can send search and destroy teams to the location where the abandoned Rebel base currently stands. Blackbird confirmed earlier that the transmission was received, thus the base will be empty by the time it is searched.
I still lack the blueprints for the Death Star, but with the Admiral on my side, I know that I will not have to search very hard. Once those plans are in the hands of the Rebellion, along with all other updated Empire ship blue prints, routes, and vessel information, then my job is to simply sit and watch over Vader.
As a side note, which I do not understand why this is noteworthy, I already know my collegue Emporer Chihuahua will still never fully trust Firmus. That is a given. For whatever reason, Emporer believes that as long as my heart is on the line, then I will lose my objectivity. I am thankful he remains my constant companion and guide in the physical world.
I awaited for him in his quarters.
It was there we confronted each other. He apparently found this journal and said he knew I had been spying. I said I was aware he was previously committed to another and felt betrayed. A man cannot propose to one woman after being committed to another, that is a great sin among my people. It was at that point he said that there was some sort of dissolution of the relationship, which placed my mind at ease. But I believe the heart of our issues was resolved in that he is loyal to his job, as I was loyal to my own, but the miracle was that we are loyal to each other. He confided at that point that he was tired of this war between the Rebels and the Empire and desired peace as much as I did.
And that is when everything changed. The illusion was that where I thought there was a divide, there wasn't one. He was helping me because he believed in what it is I am doing. I am bringing an end to this war. I know I cannot do it alone, but his support has placed my mind at great ease.
The Rebel base is coming up soon. To give the illusion of the Admiral doing a supurb job, I am giving him the coordinates tomorrow so that he can send search and destroy teams to the location where the abandoned Rebel base currently stands. Blackbird confirmed earlier that the transmission was received, thus the base will be empty by the time it is searched.
I still lack the blueprints for the Death Star, but with the Admiral on my side, I know that I will not have to search very hard. Once those plans are in the hands of the Rebellion, along with all other updated Empire ship blue prints, routes, and vessel information, then my job is to simply sit and watch over Vader.
As a side note, which I do not understand why this is noteworthy, I already know my collegue Emporer Chihuahua will still never fully trust Firmus. That is a given. For whatever reason, Emporer believes that as long as my heart is on the line, then I will lose my objectivity. I am thankful he remains my constant companion and guide in the physical world.
Exploring the Ship, Part Deus
At dinner, the Admiral and I sat and talked about little things. During this time, Emporer Chihuahua continually interrupted me with his usual commentary. He was persistent I avoid the Admiral at all costs, and I assurred him that everything was going to be fine. The interesting point in the conversation was when I asked about if Vader knew of my presence and if the Admiral was serious in his previous nights' commentary that I was his prisoner on the ship. He denied that these were accurate, but Emporer Chihuahua insisted there was possibly some truth in the matter, and to remain on edge.
I requested to see the War Room, since only high ranking officials were allowed in. During our stroll there, the Admiral told me about his early years of military service and childhood. It appeared that he went into the Academy and it was during a cantina fight that Vader took him on as his second-in-command, after the Orloff incident (I think I misspelled that, but you get the idea). Anyways, the Admiral is an orphan whose adoptive family perished or are somehow missing. I was moved by such a lonely childhood, that I couldn't help but to feel compassion for him.
During our stroll, Emporer Chihuahua continually requested my attention. It was difficult to maintain my cover, stay focused, and listen to his little musings. He threatened to destroy the Admiral's quarters if I did not return immediately, and I assume this is going to be how it is all going to happen from this point out. Emporer Chihuahua takes his job incredibly seriously, and for that I give him great respect. But his slightly nastier snarky side definitely showed through tonight.
After a brief tour of the war room, I saw the master computer. That is what I need to hack in order to obtain the Death Star blue prints, but access into the room is difficult without a high ranking official present, much less the security codes. The technology the Empire has surpasses anything the Rebellion has, and I almost let it slip. The Admiral appeared to catch me in the slip up before I excused myself for the evening.
Upon returning to the Admiral's quarters to retrieve Emporer Chihuahua, I did find one of the Admiral's boots gnawed upon. I would offer to muzzle the little guy, but I think he and I both reached an understanding. Never put an Empire-themed sweater on the dog. I shall order a new set of boots for the Admiral tomorrow when I return to my office.
I requested to see the War Room, since only high ranking officials were allowed in. During our stroll there, the Admiral told me about his early years of military service and childhood. It appeared that he went into the Academy and it was during a cantina fight that Vader took him on as his second-in-command, after the Orloff incident (I think I misspelled that, but you get the idea). Anyways, the Admiral is an orphan whose adoptive family perished or are somehow missing. I was moved by such a lonely childhood, that I couldn't help but to feel compassion for him.
During our stroll, Emporer Chihuahua continually requested my attention. It was difficult to maintain my cover, stay focused, and listen to his little musings. He threatened to destroy the Admiral's quarters if I did not return immediately, and I assume this is going to be how it is all going to happen from this point out. Emporer Chihuahua takes his job incredibly seriously, and for that I give him great respect. But his slightly nastier snarky side definitely showed through tonight.
After a brief tour of the war room, I saw the master computer. That is what I need to hack in order to obtain the Death Star blue prints, but access into the room is difficult without a high ranking official present, much less the security codes. The technology the Empire has surpasses anything the Rebellion has, and I almost let it slip. The Admiral appeared to catch me in the slip up before I excused myself for the evening.
Upon returning to the Admiral's quarters to retrieve Emporer Chihuahua, I did find one of the Admiral's boots gnawed upon. I would offer to muzzle the little guy, but I think he and I both reached an understanding. Never put an Empire-themed sweater on the dog. I shall order a new set of boots for the Admiral tomorrow when I return to my office.
Exploring the Ship
I messaged the Admiral that I wouldn't be coming into the office today, and began mentally mapping the ship while walking my dogs. I found several hiding passages for Emporer Chihuahua and Wicket to stay at if I got caught, and we devised a route for them to take if in such of an event. Emporer Chihuahua doesn't like the thought but understands that if I am caught, he needs to take the information stored in the microchip on his back to the Rebellion. The chip contains updated information regarding the Empire's fleet, their locations, planned routes, etc. The Emporer and Wicket are both skilled at hiding due to their incredibly compact size, and can easily stow away on freight vessels that dock with the ship. They have done this on several occasions in previous missions, thus I am confident they will be safe.
I also looked through the Admiral's private quarters for more information. Unfortunately, he does not maintain anything there but a few momentos. I assume his log book is stowed away in his office in an electronic file, but he has yet to share his access code with me. I know what I am doing is wrong, betraying the one I care so deeply about, but he knows full well who I am and my mission. The mission must be completed at all costs.
I am afraid though that my access to the Emporer will be non-existent. I have a secondary objective to take out Vader, if necessary, but his fighting ability is better than mine. At this time, I will resort to continuing to grab intelligence and relaying that to the Rebellion. Although the one piece of information I have been unsuccessful at obtaining are the blueprints for the Death Star. I will refocus my efforts on obtaining some sort of information from the Admiral at tonight's dinner.
As a side note, I have remained in the shadows and avoided drawing attention to myself as much as possible. I rarely interact with any of the other crew, except for the droids, and the Admiral. Sometimes I think it is easier to do that because I tend to see the humanness in everything, and vow to protect that part. It is difficult to not see all of the beings on this ship and think to myself, "they all have lives, dreams, wishes, and hopes too. How can I want for them to be destroyed?" As a former Jedi, my enemy are the Sith. As a rebel, my enemy is the Empire.
I also looked through the Admiral's private quarters for more information. Unfortunately, he does not maintain anything there but a few momentos. I assume his log book is stowed away in his office in an electronic file, but he has yet to share his access code with me. I know what I am doing is wrong, betraying the one I care so deeply about, but he knows full well who I am and my mission. The mission must be completed at all costs.
I am afraid though that my access to the Emporer will be non-existent. I have a secondary objective to take out Vader, if necessary, but his fighting ability is better than mine. At this time, I will resort to continuing to grab intelligence and relaying that to the Rebellion. Although the one piece of information I have been unsuccessful at obtaining are the blueprints for the Death Star. I will refocus my efforts on obtaining some sort of information from the Admiral at tonight's dinner.
As a side note, I have remained in the shadows and avoided drawing attention to myself as much as possible. I rarely interact with any of the other crew, except for the droids, and the Admiral. Sometimes I think it is easier to do that because I tend to see the humanness in everything, and vow to protect that part. It is difficult to not see all of the beings on this ship and think to myself, "they all have lives, dreams, wishes, and hopes too. How can I want for them to be destroyed?" As a former Jedi, my enemy are the Sith. As a rebel, my enemy is the Empire.
Morning Journal
I woke up with Emporer Chihuahua chiding me to put on some clothing. He's got a sense of humor, I admit, but he is just overly protective. He and I have a different relationship than mine with Wicket. Emporer Chihuahua understands what I am going through and often advises me. He's a bit sassy and snarky, but that is because he has to play that role. He tries to shock my system with reality because sometimes I just can't see the truth.
He doesn't like the Admiral. He doesn't trust him and thus wants to be out of the room whenever the Admiral is present. He believes the Admiral is keeping me as a pet and will try to turn me into a Sith at the first opportunity. And yes, it was Emporer Chihuahua who peed on the Admiral's boots this morning. Note to self: put the boots up at night.
I reconnected with my old Jedi friend, Blackbird. We reminisced about the past, and he confirmed the Rebellion did receive the coordinates to where this ship is headed and the base is being abandoned. He reminded me that out of the nearly 900 saber duels we had, I only won 25, mostly because I used mind tricks. But the discussion dropped when he asked about why I left the order. It wasn't an easy decision, but the ones that need to be made are never easy.
He doesn't like the Admiral. He doesn't trust him and thus wants to be out of the room whenever the Admiral is present. He believes the Admiral is keeping me as a pet and will try to turn me into a Sith at the first opportunity. And yes, it was Emporer Chihuahua who peed on the Admiral's boots this morning. Note to self: put the boots up at night.
I reconnected with my old Jedi friend, Blackbird. We reminisced about the past, and he confirmed the Rebellion did receive the coordinates to where this ship is headed and the base is being abandoned. He reminded me that out of the nearly 900 saber duels we had, I only won 25, mostly because I used mind tricks. But the discussion dropped when he asked about why I left the order. It wasn't an easy decision, but the ones that need to be made are never easy.
New Characters: EmpChihuahua and Jedi_ofLight
"Blackbird" (@Jedi_of Light) converses with Lady Raphaella telepathically and is one of her contacts on the light side.
Healing Arts Training
I spent a lot of time growing up at the monestary as my mother traveled in between our homeworld and where she was stationed for her diplomacy mission. I believe she took the mission to keep me away from our people, who despise inter-species canoodling. She left our homeworld when she first discovered her pregnancy, and all I had ever seen of the homeworld are holograms she would show me. But to me, that world was so removed. I considered the monestary and its monks to be my family.
I guess my natural inclination to being quiet and reserved encouraged the senior monk to take me under his wing. I never accepted the monastic vow, being that I am female, but he showed me several healing techniques that the monestary incorporated. And with the aid of my mother, she was able to bring back various references from our homeworld that further helped me develop my abilities.
Like I have said before, I am not a fighter. I have a lightsaber but I lack true ability in using it. I prefer to use my hands and mind to focus on healing, and psychic arts for defense. I practice a healing hands technique incorporated with massage, and can also send healing energy throughout the cosmos using my mind.
I guess my natural inclination to being quiet and reserved encouraged the senior monk to take me under his wing. I never accepted the monastic vow, being that I am female, but he showed me several healing techniques that the monestary incorporated. And with the aid of my mother, she was able to bring back various references from our homeworld that further helped me develop my abilities.
Like I have said before, I am not a fighter. I have a lightsaber but I lack true ability in using it. I prefer to use my hands and mind to focus on healing, and psychic arts for defense. I practice a healing hands technique incorporated with massage, and can also send healing energy throughout the cosmos using my mind.
Friday, November 19, 2010
My Feelings on the Admiral
I have been debating these feelings for quite some time. The relationship moves very quickly and I am disturbed by this, but I do not know how to slow it back down. He hardly knows anything of my past, as I his (outside of the Rebellion intelligence reports), and I do not know if that is wise.
I am starting to believe that the Empire is simply made up of very authoritarian people who desire control, but yet they are people still. What if their hearts could be changed by realizing that without freedom of expression and creativity, the Empire does not support all of its inhabitants. I believe it is the Sith that guide the Empire into being so cruel and focused on gathering resources and conquering. If the Sith were defeated, would the hearts of the people within the Empire, change?
Irregardless, these are random thoughts that flow through my head. Being that we are on opposite sides of the spectrum, I begin to question if we do not have a similar goal. For instance, why is he helping me if he did not want something different? Is it truly for me or does he desire the change I seek as well? I seek to stop the assimilation of other peoples' and cultures, and instill a democracy where all voices are equally heard. The power restored to the people. Maybe he feels this way on some level too. Or maybe he just enjoys the company, I am not too sure.
I am starting to believe that the Empire is simply made up of very authoritarian people who desire control, but yet they are people still. What if their hearts could be changed by realizing that without freedom of expression and creativity, the Empire does not support all of its inhabitants. I believe it is the Sith that guide the Empire into being so cruel and focused on gathering resources and conquering. If the Sith were defeated, would the hearts of the people within the Empire, change?
Irregardless, these are random thoughts that flow through my head. Being that we are on opposite sides of the spectrum, I begin to question if we do not have a similar goal. For instance, why is he helping me if he did not want something different? Is it truly for me or does he desire the change I seek as well? I seek to stop the assimilation of other peoples' and cultures, and instill a democracy where all voices are equally heard. The power restored to the people. Maybe he feels this way on some level too. Or maybe he just enjoys the company, I am not too sure.
The Proposal
Today started off as any other. I scheduled a few meetings, wrote a few reports, reminded Admiral Piett to concentrate, etc. I visited him in his office throughout the day for several "connecting" sessions and teased him telepathically throughout the day. Suffice it to say, I think I am a huge distraction in his life, but he is managing it.
While Emp. Chihuahua and Wicket were being walked by a droid, the Admiral brought us dinner. Unfortunately, I wasn't very hungry at all and one thing lead to another and we began having a deeper discussion. He even teased me by saying he would arrest me, and a part of me became scared if he had meant it on some level. I joked as if the Executor were my prison, to which he confirmed. My heart sank if that was indeed the truth. But that evening, he appeared shy on some level, nervous on another, and finally proposed over a napkin ring. I was filled with both excitement and dread. Was that what all of this was about? He wasn't going to turn me in? I was excited because well, who wouldn't be excited! Dread because, of what it could mean. The nuptuals would have to remain secret because of the fact that we are supposed to be enemies due to my allegience to the Empire... oh wait, I mean the Rebellion. And all I want is to take it slow as we decided what to do in the next step. If the Sith found out, he could lose everything. How could I live with myself under those circumstances?
I am an enemy of the Empire and the Sith, I know. But my perception of the Empire (at the least) seemed to change in my relationship with Admiral Piett. He seems to be more connected emotionally than I first thought. He was playful, humorous, witty, and quite the romantic. That is nothing I perceived the Empire to be. After all, the Rebellion intelligence files stated he tended to be aloof and narcissistic, and I don't know if I am seeing that. *Note to self: Must send an update to Rebellion on their files of Admiral Piett*
During the day, I managed to transmit the Executor's location and destination to the Rebellion via a small droid that I had sent with a ship that had docked with our vessel. There are very few times that the Executor receives outside vessels, so I do not know when I will be able to transmit my next log to the Rebellion. We are headed towards one of the smaller Rebel bases and the droid should be intercepted in enough time for the base to be abandoned and destroyed (if necessary). The Admiral hunts the Rebels as if under some sort of spell, but I wonder if it is possible I can raise enough compassion in his heart to be a bit less "enthusiastic" about his occupation.
I did ask the Admiral if he feared losing everything if it was discovered he was hiding me aboard his vessel. He stated it was not a concern. That alone concerns me, because either someone above him knows and is allowing him to keep me as a "pet", or he will become blind and lose his sense of judgement and potentially make a slip up.
Lastly, I am fortunate enough to not have run into Vader on the ship. He tends to be a loner and to himself for the most part, and I have mentally shielded myself incredibly. It is draining to do somedays, but I must continue to do so for my safety. I believe he will be off and on the ship in the next few weeks on various "expeditions" (for lack of a better term), so I can focus more on intelligence gathering. I have already memorized the layout of the vessel, with the exception of the areas around Vader's secured zone.
But yes, I did accept the proposal after much hesitation and debate. He took a chance in being impulsive, and therefore, I can only meet him halfway. Tomorrow brings a new day as I rest with him beside me.
While Emp. Chihuahua and Wicket were being walked by a droid, the Admiral brought us dinner. Unfortunately, I wasn't very hungry at all and one thing lead to another and we began having a deeper discussion. He even teased me by saying he would arrest me, and a part of me became scared if he had meant it on some level. I joked as if the Executor were my prison, to which he confirmed. My heart sank if that was indeed the truth. But that evening, he appeared shy on some level, nervous on another, and finally proposed over a napkin ring. I was filled with both excitement and dread. Was that what all of this was about? He wasn't going to turn me in? I was excited because well, who wouldn't be excited! Dread because, of what it could mean. The nuptuals would have to remain secret because of the fact that we are supposed to be enemies due to my allegience to the Empire... oh wait, I mean the Rebellion. And all I want is to take it slow as we decided what to do in the next step. If the Sith found out, he could lose everything. How could I live with myself under those circumstances?
I am an enemy of the Empire and the Sith, I know. But my perception of the Empire (at the least) seemed to change in my relationship with Admiral Piett. He seems to be more connected emotionally than I first thought. He was playful, humorous, witty, and quite the romantic. That is nothing I perceived the Empire to be. After all, the Rebellion intelligence files stated he tended to be aloof and narcissistic, and I don't know if I am seeing that. *Note to self: Must send an update to Rebellion on their files of Admiral Piett*
During the day, I managed to transmit the Executor's location and destination to the Rebellion via a small droid that I had sent with a ship that had docked with our vessel. There are very few times that the Executor receives outside vessels, so I do not know when I will be able to transmit my next log to the Rebellion. We are headed towards one of the smaller Rebel bases and the droid should be intercepted in enough time for the base to be abandoned and destroyed (if necessary). The Admiral hunts the Rebels as if under some sort of spell, but I wonder if it is possible I can raise enough compassion in his heart to be a bit less "enthusiastic" about his occupation.
I did ask the Admiral if he feared losing everything if it was discovered he was hiding me aboard his vessel. He stated it was not a concern. That alone concerns me, because either someone above him knows and is allowing him to keep me as a "pet", or he will become blind and lose his sense of judgement and potentially make a slip up.
Lastly, I am fortunate enough to not have run into Vader on the ship. He tends to be a loner and to himself for the most part, and I have mentally shielded myself incredibly. It is draining to do somedays, but I must continue to do so for my safety. I believe he will be off and on the ship in the next few weeks on various "expeditions" (for lack of a better term), so I can focus more on intelligence gathering. I have already memorized the layout of the vessel, with the exception of the areas around Vader's secured zone.
But yes, I did accept the proposal after much hesitation and debate. He took a chance in being impulsive, and therefore, I can only meet him halfway. Tomorrow brings a new day as I rest with him beside me.
Telepathic Communication
One of the bonuses for training with the Jedi is the ability to telepathically communicate, if the skill is strong enough. I have several links, but sometimes the channel gets a bit fuzzy when there is great distance between two people. And the telepathy can be blocked on occasion, especially the one I have for my former Jedi master.
As previously explained, I have links to both the assassin (RikuODST) and Firmus (Admiral Piett). The connection to Firmus helps us to elude suspicion from the other Empire staffers, and avoids the comms system entirely. Thus, the messages cannot be intercepted.
I do make sure to shield what I read, because not everyone wants ALL of their private thoughts invaded. Those I will file somewhere in a mental cabinet labeled, "to be used at a later time."
As previously explained, I have links to both the assassin (RikuODST) and Firmus (Admiral Piett). The connection to Firmus helps us to elude suspicion from the other Empire staffers, and avoids the comms system entirely. Thus, the messages cannot be intercepted.
I do make sure to shield what I read, because not everyone wants ALL of their private thoughts invaded. Those I will file somewhere in a mental cabinet labeled, "to be used at a later time."
The Twist
Knowing Piett's history of deflecting responsibility of his mistakes onto others, I sometimes wonder if he has this intention for me. It is difficult to trust someone from the Dark Side, and Piett hunts the rebellion with a furvor. He never discusses his job with me, as that would indeed be a conflict of interest, but I cannot help but to wonder if the other Sith know that I am here. Are they allowing me to stay? Have they tapped my message line and are watching me? Am I indeed the cat that I think I am, or am I more of the mouse playing into a trap?
The Assassin showed that someone knows where I am and who I am. The confrontation with Snowcoog proves this point as well. If I cannot hide who I am from even the underlings, then I have been compromised at the highest levels.
It is virtually impossible to train and improve my fighting skills as the Executor is a rather crowded vessel, and I cannot find the space. I spend my time mostly in meditation and scoping out the ship for the best hiding spaces and passageways, should I ever need to escape. But then I wonder. Would I leave without the Admiral? He risks so much for my safety, his career, his life, his crew. How could I repay him with such insensitivity? But then I remember he is part of the Empire, and they are my sworn enemy.
But there is a softness to him I believe very few get to see.
I am torn. I hold reservations if I was ready for this mission, but the Rebellion holds me in high esteem. I have the coordinates of where the Executor is heading to in its hunt for the rebel base. I must transmit them shortly.
The Assassin showed that someone knows where I am and who I am. The confrontation with Snowcoog proves this point as well. If I cannot hide who I am from even the underlings, then I have been compromised at the highest levels.
It is virtually impossible to train and improve my fighting skills as the Executor is a rather crowded vessel, and I cannot find the space. I spend my time mostly in meditation and scoping out the ship for the best hiding spaces and passageways, should I ever need to escape. But then I wonder. Would I leave without the Admiral? He risks so much for my safety, his career, his life, his crew. How could I repay him with such insensitivity? But then I remember he is part of the Empire, and they are my sworn enemy.
But there is a softness to him I believe very few get to see.
I am torn. I hold reservations if I was ready for this mission, but the Rebellion holds me in high esteem. I have the coordinates of where the Executor is heading to in its hunt for the rebel base. I must transmit them shortly.
Thursday, November 18, 2010
The Assassin
On my first night on board the Admiral's ship, I sensed a presence. A dark presence. It was an emptiness, that felt Sith-like. I slept with my lightsaber under my pillow.
This morning, the Assassin revealed itself. It had read eyes and a face mask. I buckled for some reason, and it choked me while I was in the Admiral's quarters. It began to throw me against the wall when the Admiral opened the communication line and I revealed I was in danger. He rushed to my aid right when the Sith was leaving. I was unable to penetrate it's forcefield, and the strangest thing happened. For some reason, I lost complete control over myself and somehow threw lightening from my hands. This is a Sith thing to do, and I am frightened. I do not know what this means. I am not a Sith, yet my emotions overcame all of the years of my training.
I collapsed onto the bed agonizing over what had happened. The assassin left without explaining who he was or what he wanted, and I was left bewildered. Who am I? Am I a Sith like they are? Or am I Jedi? I do not know anymore.
Lastly, I was able to establish a telepathic line to the Sith assassin. It mocked my ability to do so, but in doing so proved that the line was established.
I regained my composure and began my duties as secretary to the Admiral. To preserve the appearance that I merely work for him, I was assigned separate quarters.
This morning, the Assassin revealed itself. It had read eyes and a face mask. I buckled for some reason, and it choked me while I was in the Admiral's quarters. It began to throw me against the wall when the Admiral opened the communication line and I revealed I was in danger. He rushed to my aid right when the Sith was leaving. I was unable to penetrate it's forcefield, and the strangest thing happened. For some reason, I lost complete control over myself and somehow threw lightening from my hands. This is a Sith thing to do, and I am frightened. I do not know what this means. I am not a Sith, yet my emotions overcame all of the years of my training.
I collapsed onto the bed agonizing over what had happened. The assassin left without explaining who he was or what he wanted, and I was left bewildered. Who am I? Am I a Sith like they are? Or am I Jedi? I do not know anymore.
Lastly, I was able to establish a telepathic line to the Sith assassin. It mocked my ability to do so, but in doing so proved that the line was established.
I regained my composure and began my duties as secretary to the Admiral. To preserve the appearance that I merely work for him, I was assigned separate quarters.
Darth Jesus and SnowCoog
A small Sith organization lead by Darth Jesus voted me into their folds. I used my charm and deception to get through their defenses, and was taken in. I assumed the role of the secretary, to remain unassuming. This organization had a third member, EvilFreakazoid, who was removed most of the time.
Within a short span, SnowCoog suspected I was not Sith and a spy, thus my cover was blown. I was ordered within two days to prove myself. Darth Jesus appointed a new underling in the interim.
During this time, I developed a relationship with the Empire's Admiral Piett. We shared cookies together and soon began to talk. Our relationship blossomed and I revealed who I was to the Admiral. Surprisingly, the Admiral agreed to hide me aboard his ship as his secretary, after he was unable to obtain written documentation from Vader to avoid my confrontation with Darth Jesus, as I was going to be a certified Empire underling. I eventually admitted that I had lied to the Admiral to gain his trust, and expecting for him to out me to the Sith, he showed amazing support and courage.
I feel torn. My mission is critical, but my emotions are overtaking me. Do I complete my objective, or do I take into account I am putting the Admiral's life and crew in danger with my presence? I feel so guilty for what I had done, that I lied and charmed my way to build trust. If I would have only known that the Admiral would have accepted me for who I was without the lies, maybe it would have been different.
The eventual final battle with Darth Jesus' crew never manifested, and I was able to continue hiding on the Admiral's ship, the Star Dreadnought Executor.
Within a short span, SnowCoog suspected I was not Sith and a spy, thus my cover was blown. I was ordered within two days to prove myself. Darth Jesus appointed a new underling in the interim.
During this time, I developed a relationship with the Empire's Admiral Piett. We shared cookies together and soon began to talk. Our relationship blossomed and I revealed who I was to the Admiral. Surprisingly, the Admiral agreed to hide me aboard his ship as his secretary, after he was unable to obtain written documentation from Vader to avoid my confrontation with Darth Jesus, as I was going to be a certified Empire underling. I eventually admitted that I had lied to the Admiral to gain his trust, and expecting for him to out me to the Sith, he showed amazing support and courage.
I feel torn. My mission is critical, but my emotions are overtaking me. Do I complete my objective, or do I take into account I am putting the Admiral's life and crew in danger with my presence? I feel so guilty for what I had done, that I lied and charmed my way to build trust. If I would have only known that the Admiral would have accepted me for who I was without the lies, maybe it would have been different.
The eventual final battle with Darth Jesus' crew never manifested, and I was able to continue hiding on the Admiral's ship, the Star Dreadnought Executor.
No Turning Back
With a heavy heart, I left the Rebellion headquarters knowing I would most likely never return. I know the path I have chosen is difficult, that I must become one with the Sith inner circle (or close to them) in order to relay information to the Rebellion. The ultimate goal is if I were to have the opportunity, I would have to take out the Emporer. But with Vader in the way, I do not know if this is possible.
My spy training is complete, but my Jedi training was never completed. I left of my own accord due to... a situation with another Jedi. It is not appropriate to discuss in this forum, but in due time I may discuss it further.
I travel to the known gathering places of the Empire. I must infiltrate their organization and gain their trust.
My spy training is complete, but my Jedi training was never completed. I left of my own accord due to... a situation with another Jedi. It is not appropriate to discuss in this forum, but in due time I may discuss it further.
I travel to the known gathering places of the Empire. I must infiltrate their organization and gain their trust.
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